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Category Archive for: ‘masturbation’

Pastor: Straight males who masturbate are homosexuals….

There is crazy and then there is batshit crazy. And this dumbass falls under the later.  Mark Driscoll, a pastor at Seattle’s Mars Hill Church, beleives that masturbating alone means you are gay. “Masturbation can be a form of homosexuality because it is a sexual act that does not involve a woman. If a man were to masturbate while engaged …

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Witnesses Mistake Man’s Parkinson’s for a little "Pocket Pool"

Security told police at 1:41 p.m. Sept. 5 that a man was masturbating in the magazine section of a SOM Center Road store. Several witnesses gave statements to police. The suspect was described as a white man in his 60s, with a ponytail. He was with a woman and possibly left the area in a black Pacifica. The man told …

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Masturbation Classes in Florida…

This ad was in backpage.com in Ft. Lauderdale section. A masturbation encouragement (love it) class is being offered to single men by a swingers club, hot!…I am frantically trying to book my flight as we speak!Deenie’s Hideaway is having a promotion for all you single guys. We want to introduce our club to as many new faces as possible. We …

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Masturbation horror stories…

Mens Health has an article on JO nightmares…It’s good reading for the sexually ambitious. The man who inserted a tube you know where A 40-year old man inserted a 55-inch tube into his bladder for masturbation, according to a recent Japanese case study. The tube remained in his urethra for two years before it was surgically removed. “This is more common …

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Man sets church on fire over anti masturbation stance…

An Orange County man charged with lighting fires at an Irvine church because he was disgruntled about its teachings against masturbation was convicted Tuesday of committing hate-crime arson, authorities said.lols…Dude seriously, is jail worth protesting a church over jerking off? Besides do you really thing the members of the clergy from that church are not leaving yellow stains on every …

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Teenage boys masturbate more than girls…

MONDAY, Aug. 1 (HealthDay News) — A new nationwide look at data on masturbation among U.S. adolescents finds that boys do it much more often than girls, (wow that’s a shocker!) and they also tend to start earlier. In addition, masturbation in adolescence appears to be tied to other types of behavior, including both a greater likelihood of engaging in …

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Chronic Masturbator sues state to allow porn in prison…

Omg! Kyle Richards filed the five-page handwritten lawsuit June 10 in U.S. District Court in Detroit. He wants a judge to let inmates possess erotic/pornographic materials along with personal televisions, video game consoles and radios. “Such living conditions have been used as a method of ‘psychological warfare’ against prisoners, in order to both destroy the morale of inmates and break …

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Man chases woman into drugstore and Jerks off.

EL SEGUNDO, Calif. (KTLA) — Authorities are searching for a man who chased a woman into a drug store and masturbated in front of her. It happened on May 23 at a Walgreens on the 300 block of North Sepulveda Boulevard. Police say the man followed the woman for several blocks in a metallic blue Lexus sport utility vehicle. deets …

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Ouch!

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Did you know that May is national masturbation month? I just found out. You can find it all over the internet. Apparently it started in 1995. How this has gotten by me all these years is beyond me. But as i was thinking about it, I thought, do men really need a masturbation month? Hello? It does not take prodding to make …

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Words Banned On Turkish Internet: Gay, and #31 (masturbation)

How did they come up with the number 31 for male masturbation? God only knows. When Apple’s iPad went on sale recently in Turkey it sold out in less than an hour. The voracious appetite of Turks for web gadgetry seems matched only by the Turkish government’s desire to control access to the Internet. Turkey already has the unenviable record of …

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Twitter Users Masturbate More….

You know i always love a good survey… You probably knew this already, but, according to a sex study by the Daily Beast using data culled from OK Cupid users, Twitter users masturbate more than non-Twitter users, and their relationships don’t last as long as the relationships of non-Twitter users. Does one have something to do with the other? Probably, …

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Reichen " I have seen Less Flattering Photos Of Me"

RumorFix contacted Reichen about the cam scandal and here is what he had to say: “I don’t feel that this story represents anything different in me than what the majority of gay men have done at one point or another — as far as posting a private picture over internet lines for private viewing.” He goes on to write, “In …

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Reichen Lehmkuhl Masturbating On Cam!

Ok so do you want to see the full frontal erect pics of Reichen? Click on the link below, the photos are too racy for my to put on my site, but why should you be denied!  Go here

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Masturbation Cures Restless Leg & Hay Fever!!!

Get your hairy palms ready cuz here is the cure for you restless leg syndrome and Hay Fever! And who said too much jerkin’ off is bad for you? I am suddenly having visions of lube flying off the shelves of drugs stores and sex shops. this could cause a shortage. Omg, i may never leave my computer!!RLS is a …

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Teen Arrested For Masturbating On Underwear In Locker Room…

Platte County in far western Missouri. That’s where John Gallagher, 19, was arrested last week on charges of breaking into his former high school and masturbating on underwear left in the locker room. According to KCTV, Gallagher (pictured here) is believed to have entered the school through an unlocked window on eleven different occasions between January 27 and March 23. …

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Skidmore College Bathrooms Tell Students To Masturbate….

SARATOGA SPRINGS, N.Y. – A “how-to-masturbate” poster in bathrooms has been stirring up some controversy at Skidmore College in Saratoga Springs lately.The posters are part of a publication the college’s Center for Sex and Gender Relations releases called the “Racy Reader.” This edition is called “Your Body is a Wonderland” featuring the masturbation poster in order to promote a way …

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Reality Star Jeff Brazier Licks His Own Penis….

JEFF BRAZIER claims he can give himself oral sex and that he uses his unusual skill to help others. Despite the self-pleasuring opportunities available, the Dancing on Ice contestant employs his tongue-to-penis abilities to brighten the mood of people who are down in the dumps and to entertain work colleagues. “I did it for everyone when I was on Shipwrecked,” …

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Dr. Phil Tells Lady What She Should have done When She Caught Her Husband Masturbating…

As one of the panel members on Oprah’s All Stars on her OWN network, a woman asked what she should have done when she caught her husband pulling his pud…Pretty funny…

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Disgraced Preacher Ted Haggard Liked To Take Crystal, Watch Porn and Edge For A Long Time..

Oh my, Teddy Hagg…. “I think that probably, if I were 21 in this society, I would identify myself as a bisexual.” But, he told GQ’s Kevin Roose: “I’m 54, with children, with a belief system, and I can have enforced boundaries in my life. Just like you’re a heterosexual but you don’t have sex with every woman that you’re …

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Texas Mom Angry, Forced To Explain Vegetable Masturbation Billboard To Child…

On I-35 north to Dallas this billboard, from Metroplex-area sex shopsSara’s Secret and Condoms To Go, has put “parents in a pickle” over how to explain to their kids what in the sam hell this ad is trying to convey. The ad’s contention that “thousands of cucumbers are assaulted every day” is, perhaps, true, but the use of vegetables and …

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Facebook Surpasses Masturbation…Wtf?

PALO ALTO, CAL. (SatireWire.com) – In yet another sign of its growing dominance, Facebook today announced it has surpassed masturbation as the world’s most popular way to kill 10 minutes. In response, Twitter claimed it has surpassed premature ejaculation as the most disappointing way to kill 5 seconds. Facebook’s claim comes on the heels of a new study estimating that …

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Man Arrested For Masturbating In Movie Theater Watching Harry Potter…

Meet Alexander Ofner. The South Carolina man, 39, was arrested yesterday afternoon at Sea Turtle Cinemas after Bluffton Police Department officers responded to a 911 call about Ofner’s alleged indecent exposure. Using the projection booth as an observation post (as “Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows” unspooled nearby), cops spotted Ofner in the act, according to police. Ofner, seated in …

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