The Captain Has Turned Off the Seatbelt Signs, You are Free To Jerk Off In the Cabin…

Seriously? Nervous flyers all have different ways of coping. I am loaded up on so much xanni, it’s a crap shoot if i am even going to make to my destination breathing. Sometimes an ambien cap off is a nice touch too! But this dude pulling out his peen and stroking like he was in a 7 mile high circle jerk is a little (or big) bit extreme. Seriously the last thing i am thinking about on a plane is David Beckham in a jockstrap…

Kyle Pearce, 25, was busted after United Airlines Flight 340 arrived in Denver from Spokane, Washington, according to an affidavit sworn by FBI Agent Martin Daniel. Pearce, pictured at right, was named in a May 20 misdemeanor criminal complaint charging him with making an “obscene and indecent exposure of his person” on an aircraft.

As detailed by Daniel, an 18-year-old woman told investigators that she was seated in row 18 next to Pearce, who was in an aisle seat. “I sat next to a man on a plane who was masterbating [sic]. I heard a noise and looked over and saw his penis,” the teenager recalled in a written statement. She added, “He ejaculated & got some on the seat. Then he went to the bathroom for a long time.”” deets here

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